My dog learning nodejs.

Boss : How do you access code at home ?

Me : Well, Git is fairly accessible from anywhere with the right credentials at hand

Boss : What of you have virus in your system ? Can't the virus infect our NodeJS code ?

Since then, I haven't been able to get out of the mental comatose induced.

We recently hired a fronted dev and she got confident enough to suggest we use nodejs, my literal reply:

We hired you so we would not have to deal with JavaScript.

Should see her face 😂

Underlying pure C library and NodeJS wrapper

So I was code reviewing this guy's code before merging into the master branch.... and then I FOUND THIS FUCKING CODE, WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the fuck is this ???

Person: "Shall I put PHP inside HTML or HTML inside PHP?"
Person: *sudo apt-get install nodejs*

Being a Node.JS developer is like...

Explaining devRant post to my girlfriend is like debugging NodeJS.

Made a NodeJS chat thing, had a nice talk with myself

It would be really FUCKING great if NodeJS or mysql could give me a FUCKING shout or ERROR MESSAGE when one of the parameters I'm giving is not the RIGHT FUCKING DATA TYPE INSTEAD OF THROWING A RANDOM ERROR THAT DOESN'T INDICATE A WRONG MOTHERFUCKING DATA TYPE. Five FUCKING hours of debugging later.

Felt adventurous and tried out nodejs.

Yall mind if i throw up real fast?

The Adventures of my Project Manager.
--- Part 1

a little back story first:
-----------------------------
The project manager is the CEO's younger brother.
-----------------------
end of back story.

PM: Hey, we should stop using Nodejs on our API.
ME: Why?
PM: I don't see why it is necessary when we could make our android app talk directly with MongoDB.
.................
ME: QUE?!

Scientifically proven. 100% accurate ..

🎶 On the sixth day of debugging my program gave to me ...

6 failed tests
5 help forums
4 broken dependencies
3 edge cases
2 moving specs
And 1 keyboard smashed in rage 🎶

This little carol is dedicated to the buggy-as-fuck nodejs project I was given for fixes and updates.

Happy holidays everyone

"Start Learning Programming with NodeJS" courses' lecturers be like

What if Donald Trump (or Drumpf :|) was a developer

"I will make PHP GREAT again"

"I will KICK OUT all NODEJS developers from the office premises"

"I will install a FIREWALL in my system so my colleagues cant access anything "
But sir this is not how it works, besides its very impractical
"And my colleagues will PAY for it"

😉😁😁

This would actually probably be better than nodejs

Was handed a nodejs project for refactoring.. all I've got to say is ..

working on two projects.
at the same time.
for 2 different companies
2 completely different scenarios
2 completely different languages

nodejs and golang

From 'Javascript' then 'jquery' 😬 then 'angular 1' 😐..wait their is 'angular 2' damn this just a new framework compared to angular 1.(back-end) 'Nodejs' 😩, wait! you have to learn 'Express' after sometime upgrade to 'Hapi' wait now am on 'loopback' can't we just have one standard framework 😣😣😣

If langs/platforms were pokemon

Nodejs i choose u
Nodejs uses async attack

Your turn

FUCK NODEJS
FUCK NPM
FUCK ANGULAR
FUCK ALL THOSE FUCKIN PACKAGES
FUCK THIS PILE OF CRAP MAKING ME WASTE MY TIME

Me (front dev): We should use nodejs for this project...
CTO (back): Nah... Fu*k Node! Php ftw
Now: we have a php framework with a nodejs server for the front end

I know a LOT of people like it...but NodeJS...I still don't know why it's here.

Hey guys!
Just joined devRant! Can't wait to get more involved!
Bored in the lockdown, I built an app which lets you chat with people around you.
Its called Cyrcl!
Built in over ~40 days, I was the sole developer.
Here is the tech stack - React native for the android and ios apps, mongodb and redis for the database, nodejs for the server and aws ec2 for the hosting!
I'd love to get some feedback, or discuss some of the hacks!
- Ardy

learning nodejs and it's awesome

NodeJS

I find it ironic that some python devs hate on nodejs because of npm modules. But then go ahead and create a virtual environment for every new python project.

- Team_leader_1: I know you're a frontend developer, but trust me NodeJS has threads :) sync operations don't block the main thread :)
- Team_leader_2: You need to study the theory :) NodeJs can handle further operations during the sync function :) it spawns a new thread, you haven't studied Javascript well enough :)
- Me, very ready to dab on 2 condescending little fucks:

Sick of hipster nodejs devs with their beards and fucking guitars. You guys are creating a bad reputation for the rest of us.

node_modules

Wow, after 4 years of working with PHP, and now working with NodeJS and ASP Core, I gotta admit that PHP is pure shit.
It's really awesome to see the documentation provided for NodeJs and ASPCore.
75% of PHP documentation isunreadable crap. Every fucking variable starts with a fucking dollar sign, wtf! How unpleasant is to read that. And holy mother of god, why concatenate with a dot ? We all know "+" means "add, aggregate, etc". PHP is unreadable as fuck. Fuck laravel, fuck Yii, fuck Composer.

Seriously guy, move to NodeJs or AspCore. Both of them are pretty good.

>Installs NodeJS (from default Debian repo)
>Tries to install yarn
>Yarn tries to uninstall nodejs

Weird
>apt-cache depends yarn
yarn
Recommends: nodejs
Conflicts: nodejs

10/10, gave me a good chuckle. Time to add the NodeJS repo.

Step 1 - Start with socket.io in NodeJS to create chat extension for browsers
Step 2 - Let's authenticate the users
Step 3 - Cry

Alice in node_modules

Am I the only one here who hates PHP and preferred Javascript & NodeJS?

Today was the first time I was able to develop a full stack by my self!!!!
(I mean not by myself, StackOverflow was my Bible)

It's a small project with three modules , and while I've worked front end, back end and machine learning separately, I used to develop on a single component.

Today I built all the components on my own.

The hardest part was linking the nodejs file with the python script. Which seemed easy at first but then I needed to go through the documentation to understand the working behind the scenes.

Just looking how to deploy it now

This is a victory rant.
While it is not something big I feel so proud of myself 🥰

Time spent during a nodejs project:
- 2-4 hours trying to install modules and dependencies.
- 1 hour actual coding!

Called someone special...
She didnt pick up...
Then was no "CALLBACKS" for 2 days...
Which made me break my "PROMISE"...

(JS and NodeJS DEVS will understand)

I met a programmer in an online dating app some months ago. She worked with golang, and things were going nicely with us talking a bit.
Then I mentioned that I currently work with Typescript and NodeJS and she stopped responding 😞

Should have posted this as story, since this is not actually a joke.

That moment when you realize that if you want fast with nodejs you should know cpp

I like npm errors.

So i installed nodejs on termux on my android smartphone to watch npm fail, even when I take a walk.

Great times!

If only nodejs, mongodb and stuff are taught in my university instead of goddamn php and mysql

So our last project was a hybrid application in Cordova
During client meeting:

Client (digital mobile lead) : So we have to integrate Nodejs in our App

Me: huh :|||

BD guy: yes SIR, yes SIR

Me: we cant integrate like that, both are different things and have different applications :|

Client: I am told that Nodejs is FAST and its Javascript

BD guy: yes SIR, yes SIR

Me: but (just started to explain the difference)

Client: we need to increase the 'bandwidth', we want another senior resource for this project

BD guy: yes SIR, yes....

Me: what the FUCK :|

It's rant time again. I was working on a project which exports data to a zipped csv and uploads it to s3. I asked colleagues to review it, I guess that was a mistake.

Well, two of my lesser known colleague reviewed it and one of the complaints they had is that it wasn't typescript. Well yes good thing you have EYES, i'm not comfortable with typescript yet so I made it in nodejs (which is absolutely fine)

The other guy said that I could stream to the zip file and which I didn't know was possible so I said that's impossible right? (I didn't know some zip algorithms work on streams). And he kept brushing over it and taking about why I should use streams and why. I obviously have used streams before and if had read my code he could see that my code streamed everything to the filesystem and afterwards to s3. He continued to behave like I was a literall child who just used nodejs for 2 seconds. (I'm probably half his age so fair enough). He also assumed that my code would store everything in memory which also isn't true if he had read my code...

Never got an answer out of him and had to google myself and research how zlib works while he was sending me obvious examples how streams work. Which annoyed me because I asked him a very simple question.

Now the worst part, we had a dev meeting and both colleagues started talking about how they want that solutions are checked and talked about beforehand while talking about my project as if it was a failure. But it literally wasn't lol, i use streams for everything except the zipping part myself because I didn't know that was possible.

I was super motivated for this project but fuck this shit, I'm not sure why it annoys me so much. I wanted good feedback not people assuming because I'm young I can't fucking read documentation and also hate that they brought it up specifically pointing to my project, could be a general thing. Fuck me.

Finally moving to new job. From monolith PHP dev, to nodejs.

Colleague while reviewing my latest commit.
Him: Hey, RemusWasTaken, why did you leave this debug log in here?
Me: That function won't work unless I leave that line exactly there.
Him: It can't stay, come here so we can fix it.

Three hours of debugging later, this Friday afternoon.

Him: Okay, I give up. Let's leave it there for now.
Me: I did the same thing yesterday. Time well spent.

Nodejs is weird sometimes, or we are incompetent devs.

Daily activity, just try new nodejs rest api framework fastify, anyone already using it ?

I'm really enjoying rust now. It was worth the struggles.

I was really surprised to see, a NodeJS server takes around 40-60MB of memory whereas Rust (Actix web) server takes around 500KB-2MB :O whoa! Awesome!

Starting to learn nodejs/express. It's not that scary as I thought..

You can never understand everything. But, you should push yourself to understand the system.

- Ryan Dahl (Creator of Node JS)

I must learn jQuery and NodeJS. It's amazing the potential of JS. My lastest 10 programs were written in pure JS and I made them in a few hours. As an electronic engineer I hate the high level languages but JS (and maybe Python) it's definitely excluded from the list.

This is the fifth time that I've done this and I still screw up node with nodejs

Just found out about Extern OS... It's built with NodeJS?!

WTF

I like js and node in general.
But there's this thing I hate about NodeJs...

The blogs. The goddamn blogs.

Every goddamn blog post. Is code. Dozens of lines of code.

Oh, so you want X feature? Just copy paste this shit.

I swear to god, blog posts are the source versioning system to these people.

What they should instead is
a) Create a package.
b) Add tests to it.
c) Present the package to the reader with some minimal code.

But I'm a getting a huge impression that node blog writers want you to copy the code in their post, paste it in your project, and be happy with it.

Now, I'm not assuming that every person posting in medium.com is a software engineer (and by engineer I mean an engineer, not some fuckwad who begs for github stars on dev communities).

The problem to me is that they fucking SATURATE the goddamn search results.

The same goes for finding an npm package for your need, because there are so many low quality packages it's saturated too, you have too plow this stinking pile of projects that have very low quality,
and there's not a really good npm finder out there. Half of them are dead, some look and load like shit, and npm search has a low barrier for good code.

Me on rails, OTOH "ok, I need this thing", I google that and I swear to [-∞,+∞] I find GOOD packages, well designed, no cookie cutter bullshit, no obscure marketing shit on the README.md, it is very clear what this shit does, and the api is designed for HUMANS.
and it actually takes very little time to know if there's no such package.

I don't have to read dozens of fucking my-fuck-blog.io (jesus christ, the io domain has become such a fucking joke, it got fucking abused to death, there are some cool sites out there using it, but my god, James H. Marketing likes to just absorb everything he can, and the internet was not going to be a fucking exception)

does all of this make sense?

Just started using nvm for nodejs version manager... looks like I'll never look at "nvm" in text messages the same way again :/

Fuck NodeJS and Python, C# and strong-typing is all I need in life. (But python is sometimes useful)

Started learning NodeJS...
Now I have to npm install brain to think 😕

P.S: I like it though😂

I swear my brain has 2 sides:
1: c or c++ would be great for this project
2: lol c++ hard so nodejs
1: but c++ would be so much faster and c-
2: NODEJS

One day my colleague says that React Js is used for frontend as well as backend. I did not agree with him also he blames that Backend API’s also can be created using React Js. I could not believe because as per I know React Js is a library for frontend not for Backend. Still, some other colleagues supported him because he is the senior developer I am an intermediate developer.

Then I ask some of my friends who are currently working on React Js, Can we use React Js for the backend? And the next day I went office and talk to my colleague that I could not found that React JS can be used for backend and backend API. And he replied You can use nodejs. Oh! Man But I think Node and React are different tools.

When you found out your coworker is using a nodejs server with php code

Uhhh look at me I R node.js developer I R so smart I write Java Scripts on the backend uuuhhhhhh

Idiots.

After a failed brew.sh upgrade none of the nodejs packets were working anymore. I've spent the whole day googlling, reinstalling, cursing, asking for help, crying - without luck.

My boss got angry because he wanted that site yesterday.

Now i'm forced to clean install my mac tonight. I'm so tired.
Fuck!

Time to dive into learning NodeJS, wish me luck!

DRINKING GAME.

Start package installation in any NodeJS based project.

Drink every time you see a deprecation notice.

Spent 4 hours trying to figure out why my expressjs application wasn't working in my environment but DevOps loads it just fine. Turns out there's a difference between ^ and ~ on dependency version requirements. I was loading latest versions of nunjucks and NodeJs instead of stable.

What is life.

I just need to get this out.

NPM is not the worst dependency manager. It is way beyond any word in any language that can describe the most negative thing about it.

I developed nodejs projects. I like JS, it's a great language to work with. But not NODEJS, not NPM.

I can run my app in a F* browser but not once, not a single time that nodejs and npm can run at the first time. I spend way more time to build a working environment with nodejs and npm than to build my own app.

whoever developed these two pieces of crap had brains that filled with mud. And who gave them the courage to even put it out for people to use? JS is such a good language and they have ruined it.

There are so many dependency managers out there couldn't they just take a look at how human beings do things? I mean they have never seen APT or Composer or something else that actually work?

Or they just had so much ego that they had to let other people to feel how difficult their lives are.

I don't care about how you manage the dependency and I shouldn't. You people made these crap with one purpose that chould help others to develop easily but NOOOOOO, we have to spice it up, right? You just have to make it fat and greasy, right? You just have to make it doesn't work. I bet you people just redefined the F* CONSTANT of "How to Develope a System that Doesn't Work".

I don't know if NPM genius have ever did a information collection of their system. I bet most function that has been invoked is "throw error".

The funny thing is on NPM website, they provide Enterprise Solutions.... I would sue them for fraud.

NodeJS 10.0.0 is out.

The biggest features I see is the release of N-API. I always wanted to use that but never did as it was in beta. It will be exiciting to use it with a new project!

My Back-End dev suggest me to switch NodeJS to NodeJS+VUEJS&BABEL and told me that I would like it because it's fast even when I do the Front-End....

I regret it...

In case of emergency:
git commit
git push
git out

Fuck NodeJS. I don't want you to be asynchronous sometimes. My gahwd I need like 3 deep nested loops just to get you to make a request and compile a damn JSON of requests.

I'm learning Golang goodbye forever node.

NodeJS makes me feel powerless

A haiku, written in NodeJS:

This is the first line
This is the third line
This one is the second line

Why the f*ck is it so hard to setup an online live radio on NodeJS but making a freaking Google hangouts clone is not.

Helping a client to update their 5 years old payment system to support the new mobile PayPal library via Braintree.

Found out you need to install a server SDK that requires PHP 5.4.

Installed and then realised the server is still on PHP 5.3 (CentOS 6).

Panic.

Told my client that they require a new server just so that I don’t need to manage the PHP 5.3 to 5.4 update on their live server and I can install Node to use the Braintree NodeJS SDK 😇.
Feels like heaven.

Any other Screeps players here?

for the people running into a "Screeps is not defined":
Screeps is a MMO RTS where you code your "army" to do stuff in Javascript (a la NodeJS).
Code how your harvesters should behave, how your soldiers should behave, how your builders should behave etc. etc.

So far, it is quite a fun game, tho my (Intel Nehalem based) laptop has issues handling it (thanks to a awfully slow GPU...) so it's difficult to play for me at the moment (I'm on holiday, my home PC is a LOT faster).
It costs about 15 euro on steam, and if you're into this stuff, it's well worth it.
Just make sure you finish the tutorial first... I didn't and I regretted it when I bought the game (it's a huge pain in the buttocks to get started if you don't understand the API and such).

Currently just playing on my own localhosted private server to discover how the game works and such, but will be setting up a public server later down the road to play with others.
Tho it would be nice if Screeps would allow for "team-based" gameplay as well so it'll be slightly harder for early players to bully the newer ones.

I am graduating in a few days for my MBO 4(pretty sure that's like community college/college in other countries) in The Netherlands and i'll be going to start working on getting my bachelor.

To prepare, i have devised a learning plan for in the summer.

Should I learn:

(C)++ and Python
(C)++ and NodeJS
(C)++ and C#
or
(C)++ and assembly

C and C++ are languages I want to learn in any case, but as for the others I am undecided.

Thanks

Nothing worse than fixing a memory leak in NodeJs. UGH!

PHP Developer, older than me, seeking help on how to run nodejs application - "some_alien_english...some_alien_english...some_alien_english...some_alien_english... ' It working, but its not working ' ...some_alien_english...some_alien_english.........

fast forward to last line - "Its working on terminal but not working on localhost"

I like PHP but every new tech is about all the other languages ! Recently i was searching for microservice architecture and oh it's so easy with nodejs ! It's ready made for Go ! Java has a library build in ! What about Symfony ? Laravel ?

I'm getting stuck in a nodejs dependency hell

Express is so bad...
PHP is Much Better.
CHANGE MY MIND

"awesome! NodeJS allows me to create addons in c++"

Debugging nodejs... i hate it with a passion ! Anyone who agree?
i am getting nowhere,

A NodeJs framework that splits project into fullstack separated modules and allows routes inheritance

nodejs automated testing grunt mocha chai etc etc. Awwww yeaaaa

! Worst thing another dev did in our NodeJS code.

1. No indentation. Literally.
2. A single function in a module worth 1000 lines. I'm not even kidding. No breaking into smaller functions. Just a large rock with a lot of js mess scribbled.
3. No comments at all
4. Sending stray values to promises which were not required at all.
5. No jsdoc. Using camelCase and uppercase interchangeably.

AAAH, fucking aws. Why the fuck do you make documentation if it doesnt even make sense. I struggeled for hours to let your cock sucking Cognito work and I'm still fucking stuck. Why is there no proper documentation or tutorial available for nodejs. This pisses me the fuck off. I hate this piece of shit.

Ah... I feel better now.

Every nodejs programmer:

How do I check this variable is an array?
npm i isArray

So today I told my boss “nodejs without typescript is like sex with strangers without a condom. Sure it’s fun and all... but then you get an std”

confession time:
I am php laravel developer with little knowledge about nodejs.
I got selected by one startup as nodejs developer.
frankly I am not better nodejs developer than my competition who were rejected.

I completed oral interview with my nodejs theory knowledge at a time of technical round , they gave us task to create crud with fantastic front end and nodejs mongo as a back end.

I developed front end in bootstrap but at a time of backend, I just copy paste code from github.

and changed everything variable and other proof to hide reality. in mean time other candidates were actually coding everything then I took time to understand this code and I submitted after few candidates.

in last round they ask me to explain code which I explained properly and I get salary 40k/month INR.

I know it is cheating but I wanted this job badly.

Goodbye c#
Hello NodeJS

(Not by choice)

Intern position:
"Proficient understanding of NodeJS, MangoDB, Other back-end technologies.

Aw, MangoDB?

Now I can't apply..

so many frameworks for nodejs 😒😒😒😒

NodeJS > ?

Converting server time to any given local timezone is a pain in the ass.. at least in JS.

Here's what I've got:
convertNowToTimezone = (localOffset) => {
let d = new Date();
let millis = d.getTime() + (d.getTimezoneOffset() * 60000); //convert server local time to UTC millisec
d.setTime(millis - (localOffset * 60000)); //convert UTC millisec to required local time
return d;
}

where I pass localOffset as -330 (IST offset).
Works in chrome console but gives a diff of 4min in the server side nodejs I'm running it in..

🤬🤬😡😡😡😡😡

My campaign on the new hires agenda with nodejs

I quietly refactored an entire NodeJS express in-house framework that was written in Java style (dependency injection, inheritance, inversion of control) and split it into typed, composable, parameterized, testable middlewares in 2 weeks (including some complicated ones like a custom Openid Connect flow)

Now comes the hard part: convincing the Java-devs who wrote it that it is useful

Been working with NodeJS a lot lately. Finding it really convenient and flexible. As someone who spent a lot of time using C, it's like going from eating fruit to candy bars. Seems pretty amazing just npm installing whatever you need and working with those packages... Until you dare to look at the list of ingredients.

So I’ve asked one hipster js developer what does he think about golang. His answer was:
- it’s the same as nodejs, but difference is that go has pointers
O_o

Have spent now about 8h trying to install nodejs, npm and less inside a Docker machine :/

How fucked are you if someone mistakenly deletes the codebase for Nodejs, reactjs, npm, vuejs, angularjs?

NodeJS:
*Put image in Folder*
</>Import Image from "./images/image"

Xamarin
*Create Folder ONLY FROM VISUAL STUDIO*
*place image into folder*
*Properties: Build action: Embedded Resource*

THE FUCKING RECOURSEID DOESNT EVEN APPEAR WHAT THE FUCK XAMARIN

I am about to clone the WhatsApp app. 😋🤗

Using
HTML/css/js/nodejs

"have you tried deleting node_modules" sounds like "have you tried turning it off and on again"

I hate nodejs but it seems like the best way to control GPIO on a raspberry pi from a webserver

I like nodejs, when it's not written like js. I hate js.
Send help.

Java Or NodeJS for building stable and scalable backend API

All this small node modules in the npm repository that is a fork of another with a name that sounds almost like the other. It's a jungle. Then things are abandoned or changing name. How much i like coding nodejs based projects I really feel bad of the total mess with that repo. Freedom and a lot of projects are good. But the mess is like the flat of a young student that hasn't been cleaned in a year.

Java developer here. Wants to code in nodejs. Recommended ide

Been using nodejs for a rest API. It may be the old fart in me, but I'm regretting using it instead of a normal static typed language. I hope something changes my mind soon, or I'll go through a case of sunken cost fallacy.

Just got started with nodejs and I never thought I’d have to use async/await this early. Concurrency seemed like a far fetched thing. Feeling like a boss😎

NodeJS C++ add-on is one of the best and worst thing ever to exist in NodeJS.

Writing a native add-on is such a fucking pain. It's full of inconsistent API. They are trying to fix that by the introduction of N-API. But that shit is still in experimental mode.

I want to use nan but I know that that is also going to be deprecated once the N-API gets stable.

fml

NodeJS devs
what would you recommend for a highly data intensive project that *may scale* to a large level?
Express, SailsJS, or Meteor?

I'm going to kill myself.
In the nodejs server for my game, there's a function that pushes to an array.
It only works if the array is empty, no matter what type it is.
List of people that know why
- none

First week of doing C# dev. Not quite getting the hang of it yet, I’d still prefer doing nodejs all day

My boss asked me and another one to make a webapp that uses socket.io as "api".
There are 2 client apps (one in ionic+react the other one just react) and the server code (nodeJS)

Now he started working on it too but he has no experience of nodeJS and no experience whatsoever on react and only heard of ionic.

on his first deploy nothing connected anymore.

But i gotta say I appreciate the fact he's trying to keep himself up to date with technologies we're using

A question: what should i learn Nodejs or a Python Web framework (maybe django?)
I just want to learn :)

To be honest the exact bug I don't remember. I do recall that it had something stupid I had been trying to fix to get nodejs working on a raspberry pi. I finally figured it out and managed to get a simple rest server going. After hours of trying to fix what might now seem insignificant, I was not only relieved that I got it working, but also thrilled that I kept at it and managed to fix it.

selfConfidence++;

I know the Backend should be done in another language, but i really love using Nodejs for that.

Who loves NODEJS?

I just discovered electronjs and absolutely love it, even found that my fav ide vscode is build using electron on nodejs.

NodeJS = ok
fs.promises = makes it better

Why didn't Golang destroy NodeJs!? Let me hear it.

its hard to keep yourself updated with apis, specially when you are nodejs/javascript developer.

Creating a simple application to keep track of changes in api and inform the subscribers about changes.

Stack - Vue.js (quasar), nodejs, mongoDb

!dev

Where I live just got it’s first snow of the year!

This shitty nodejs is a hell of a lot less crappy when it’s accompanied by hot chocolate and snow

Got a NodeJS social media server I'm building for a side project, inches away, but my wedding looming - goodbye free time! Haha

What project could I build to learn a backend language (nodejs in my case)? Any cool ideas? 😊

What would be the easiest starting point on low level languages?

I started with java, learned to hate it.
I continued with web development, learned to hate it.
Continued with PHP, learned to hate it.
Continued with scripting languages like Python, NodeJS, etc.., hated it from the beginning but it was easy.

But everytime i touch something like c/c++/rust/etc i immeadiatly give up, because the syntax is so different than all these other high level languages and so much null/type safety and so on.

But i want to get into low level programming languages which compile to an executable and don't get executed on some "vm".

!rant
I built a webinterface a few months ago. it was based on the php framework laravel. but i want to change to nodejs in combination with mongodb.
do you know good nodejs mvc frameworks similar to laravel?

Tired of using Google.. Anyone knows cheap shared hosting that supports nodejs? :(

load balanced three micro nodejs instances with Apache in my local system. load performance improved by 50% straight.

I currently use Github as my git server and have worked a little bit with Travis. Sadly Travis can't deploy to local network targets and that's why I had the idea to create my own basic CI for the local network: It will be a simple nodejs-app and listens to pushes via Github Webhooks. Then it fetches the code from Github and runs a task runner like Gulp over it and tests it with any nodejs testing framework. Then it deploys the compiled, tested and linted app to the local network. What do you think of this idea?

Golang is better than nodejs.
What do you think?

Any idea of how to protect your nodejs source code on a client's onsite server ?

If they can SSH, they can get the entire source.

This is built into the angular framework very well but I don't know how to do this on a server.

Any neat packages for obfuscation, uglification etc ?

Does nodejs suck or am I just inexperienced

I picked a module of my nodejs app which uses MongoDB to pieces until I had no more idea what could be wrong. It should work. There could be nothing wrong. Then I thought: "What if I try to find() from the wrong collection?" Yes. Fucking YES! I've lost about 2 hours of my life because I've written the collection name in singular rather then plural. Just a fucking single character. Just a fucking "s"! Why don't you output an error? Why? Fuck you! Why don't you do that?

Imagine both having the build step AND not having a strong and reliable type system. What have we got ourselves into? Truly an asylum run by its inmates.

Almost 2022 , I am still confuse why the f### the company downgrade the project from elixir phoenix to nodejs to laravel php.

Any good hosting site for php/nodejs projects?

Trying to debug PHP when you're used to NodeJS.

Getting an existing NodeJS project up and running on Windows IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE

First conference, yay! I'm at AngularConnect in London the next two days. Exciting times.

The day I read nodejs docs

I'm tired of being forced to use an overengineered library for every little thing I'm given to implement. I don't want to add nodejs bloatware to my service just because I neet to pass single json object through a message pipeline. I'm all for reusability, but this is crossing every line now.

Why do I have to google how to start a new nodejs project every time?

Coming from NodeJS, writing APIs with Express, I now do my first steps writing APIs in golang with gin.

Now I know, Express is not the fastest solution out there, but I mean - a good 30ms is alright for non-high-performance backends. And I always thought that's on the faster end of HTTP handling..

..but then I used gin. A GET request doing a MongoDB-write and returning some json. 3ms response time. THREE MILISECONDS. holy fuck. By it's debug logs the actual handling took 540 MICROSECONDS. holy fuck I'm in love.

Great, a new tool which does the thing, that i do with that other tool just 1% more efficient. Also it integrates deeply into that other tool i am already using. I just need to install a whole new CLI, and python and nodejs to use it.
FCK OFF

Oh this looks like an interesting 10 min Nodejs tutorial on utube!

*30 minutes of fighting modules installation*

I feel like there should be a rule 34 for nodejs. If you can think of it, there is probably a nose module for it. Take for example PHP.js it's a thing...

Since some started posting pics of their work machines. Here's mine: an Asus ZenBook 3 deluxe. Nodejs dev.

Even though I like Javascript I get so frustrated over all the libs and frameworks that is so good. And then some forks. And then all deps because everyone wants to have a cool npm package. So, took a deep breath, went for a run in the forest and started looking at Go for the small service(s) that from the start was thought to be a NodeJS thing. Might be fun.

What cheap/good quality node.js hosting provider for nodejs/react/mongodb app do you suggest? (including sale, black friday etc.)

Now i understand why some people have girlfriend still being married..
me being php developer always being attracted to Nodejs :*..

Switching from Nodejs to Springboot

🙂

Anyone here who had used powerbi embedded with nodejs backend? Please I need help. Can't take this shit anymore

I just used Redux with NodeJS. Trust me it's awesome..👩‍💻

People nowadays.

Searched for JS/NodeJs frameworks.
Read the Docs for a couple of minutes and run some examples.
*Opens* CV / Linkedin to update Skillset.

---

So with the count of JS/Nodejs Frameworks, they probably have lots skills listed in their CV.

Can someone help me to get some good practices with expressjs/sequelize combinations?
I managed to find how to not have all the models in the same js page and how to organize the routing but when I look the time it took me to find, I would like to don't have to search now 😂

Project running in nodejs, angular and mongo. The boss just came and said he wants ReactJS now 😑

Great thing that nodejs cannot run in shared hosting.. Absolutely fucking great

Anyone here knows why Chrome reloads/refreshes a localhost NodeJS page slowly?

#2020 resolutions:

1. Learn Nodejs/E.
2. Learn Golang.
3. Forget to return back home from college.

Any of u guys tried nodejs? Did u like it why? Why not??

If you are bored, go watch on YouTube "Make electronic dance music using nodeJS"

Ok peeps!

A newbie to nodejs and linux VPS (ubuntu) would appreciate any tips you could throw my way on how to push locally developed nodejs webapp to prod in vps server 😊

Thanks!

Saw a lot of NodeJS/TLS jokes here, but honestly does anyone get it?

>Weird Windows 10 glitch occurs causing text in dialogue boxes and other various things to not appear until you restart your computer.
>Is working on a program in C#
>Presses button in source control.
>Yes or no dialogue appears.
>Presses yes.
>All flies in working folder disappear.
>Restarts computer to fix visual glitch.
>All files in working folder don’t actually exist anymore.
>3 months of work nowhere to be found.
>Downloads decompiler.
>Decompiles previous versions executable file.
>Continues to work on project with decompiled code for the next 6 months.
>Gets sick of everything and painfully rewrites the entire program in NodeJS.

Moral of the story: Never gamble with Windows.

I'm a Python programmer and I've been asked to build API's using Nodejs. It's been dofficult to even get the API running. Any advice on how to start? I am familiar with JavaScript

Im a php backend dev for over 7 years. (Lately mostly laravel).
Im going to look for a new job and have 2-3 free weeks to try and learn a new language and switch to that in my next job.
Please advise if i should
1. Switch to Python (should be relatively close to php oop) + opens AI jobs opportunity for the future.

2. Switch to NodeJs. (Web/api knowledge similar to php) + will be easier to learn frontend skills later (ie angular/etc)

3. Look for another PHP job. - if 2-3 weeks is not enough time to learn nodejs/python well enough to get an actual job without experience with them.

Really can't decide which path to take, please help

Going over some NodeJS code, and I feel like the scene from "Dude Where's My Car" - "And then....And then..."

Coming from almost three years of 99% python, this hurts my eyes so much

When did people decide that developing using a tech that doesn't even have a proper command line debugger is a safe bet for a production system?
NodeJS, tower of nonsense...

Javascript is actually a weird language which I dunno why I like a lot.
new Date() in NodeJS gives a different value, while new Date() in the browser console(so react js and normal js) gives a different value.
I dunno if my online searching skills are bad but I didn't find anyone addressing this online. Lol I had to create a manual work around for it then.

Learning nodejs in University

Any good open source NodeJs projects that are easy to start contributing to?

Arrify nodejs module. I always thought, that a modul is something bigger, not this function with 4 lines. Who thinks, that using a module to make an array of a value instead of copying a 4 line snippet to your code is actually a good idea?

Having so much fun with pug, and nodejs last week,
Building a demo OAuth 2.0 authentication server to simulate GitHub OAuth’s behaviour.
In the next step, I will deploy it on aws for more testing.
Blog on the way...🤞

BTW, they actually built a package for render pug to React components🙄

Hello there, long time no see.

Back in the day I asked you for a book that goes deep in the C programming language, now I'm asking the same but for Nodejs, especially a book that explains the event loop down to the line of code.

There are some articles on the internet but they are all copy/paste of one another and don't even scratch the surface of what the event loop does

I recently got into nodejs .. set up a server...
I wanna know if is it worth it to buy a raspberry pi 3 to host my web server.. so i can show my projects to my friends or even clients.
If you have a raspberry pi.. what do you use it for? 🤔

Should I learn Angular 2 or Vue 2?

Not asking which one is better, but which one suits my need better:

I want to move from PHP to nodejs frameworks; I know Vue cause it's famous in the Laravel community, but don't know about the node/js community. I heard Angular 2 is hard, but I'm changing my dev stack so might as invest some time in it. So which one should I pick?

Also, what's a good nodejs framework for starters (who aim to build production-ready apps) (also, not planning on doing mobile apps so no need for cross platform js frameworks).

Thanks in advance

If you're using fish-shell, I strongly recommend you to use "fnm" package for installing and managing nodejs various versions!
It's pretty productive 😍